I have been extremely blessed when it comes to family and friends. They have been through thick and thin with me. Unknowingly their pearls of wisdom have left a lasting impression on me and helped me through trials and tribulations.
So let me share these with you…
- Simple living extra high thinking: Daddy dearest.
This proverb might have been epitomised by Mahatma Gandhi, but it’s my dad who etched it in my mind.
At the age of 14, he sat me down to have a ‘serious career’ conversation. He said to me, “Learn to be simple, modest and grounded and reach for the stars. The sky is not the limit. Visualise your dreams and work hard towards them.” I was probably too young to understand but I never forgot.
And today I owe my success to him. He always gave me the push when needed and observed like a silent spectator in the background. For the society I was ‘the son he never had’ and he made me and my sister the ‘daughters he was proud of’.
- Unless you take risks, you won’t succeed: My Mom.
(Kuch paane ke liye, kuch khona padta hai)
I think the strength mothers possess is truly divine. This woman has stood by us like a rock even through the toughest times.
I remember her dropping me off at the bus station, when I was 18 and attending medical school, at odd hours of the night. She did everything for me.
When I was applying for study loans, looking the sky high fees, I was very scared! I had no idea how to repay all of it; I knew I was burdening my parents. But in a cool calm voice she asked me to relax. She said to me, “you have a great future ahead and if you stumble at the very first hurdle how will you make through the rest of it? Unless you take the risk, you will never know what you are capable of achieving.”
And boy, she was so right about it! Whenever I am stuck, her words get me through. (I did take the risk and came all the way alone from Mumbai to Liverpool, UK)
- One of my best friends and confidante : Salil
- Take a decision and be firm on it:
One of most difficult decisions of my life; letting go of something. I made the decision keeping my best interests in mind, but had trouble sticking to it. We all have been through it at some point in our lives. His words made me strong and when I look back, it’s been a decade and has been one of best decisions of my life!
- When you know it, you know it: another one from him.
I wanted to measure love. I wanted to know how people precisely fall in love. And he just said these simple words. And thought to myself maybe he is just saying this because he doesn’t know either!
And when I met the love of my life, it was an instant connection. I just knew it was meant to be! And his words just echoed in my head.
So buddy you were right again.
- Your past is your business, nobody else’s: My aunt Bernie
So in the 21st century I was being judged and ridiculed for having a past relationship. Number of relationships is directly proportional to a woman’s modesty. (Because the society I grew up in was/is probably set back by 200 years.)
It affected me, because my present and future were being affected by my past! So my aunt said to me, “You did things back then because in your heart you felt they were right. Nobody has the right to judge anyone based on their past.”
And I bounced right back!
- Just do it! You have my full support: My uncle Noel
Life becomes so much easier when you have that one person who supports you no matter what. Trying to be a pilot, rocket scientist, moving to another country, financial help; I have literally thrown all tricky situations at him and the answer has always been the same. YOU HAVE MY FULL SUPPORT. Always calm and serene. Always provides me with proper reasoning for everything. What Santa Claus is for kids, He is for me!
- Walk with confidence and own the place: My partner
I used to have difficulty walking into any high street stores. I got nervous placing orders in restaurants. I had a fear that I would be judged for the way I talk, walk, eat or the kind of clothes I wear. When we started dating I would avoid going to fancy places and made excuses. On our first date I carefully ordered food I could eat with a fork alone so I wouldn’t have to use the knife! And slowly things began to change for me. He made a confident person. And I learnt that by learning to laugh at my own self. So what if I slip and fall or I pronounce cuisine wrong! It’s not the end of the world, learn and move on. Have a giggle or two.
- Beat them with knowledge: My post graduate teacher and guide.
You might be criticized or laughed off at or judged for your appearance at work. Bosses might yell at you. Someone may question your competence. She asked me to be calm and carry on and increase my knowledge base. You can always justify your course of actions with knowledge.
My favourite one,
‘Right things happen at the right time!’
Copyright 2018 Chris Lemos All rights reserved